SSS....you figure it out....

I haven't written anything in a few days because I really have nothing interesting to blog about. It seems like everyone around me just keeps getting bad news....

Did you ever feel like you are in a giant slow globe and every once in awhile someone picks up your snow globe and tips it upside down and shakes it....well that's how I have felt since the beginning of the year. I am really starting to get annoyed with everything going wrong all at once. First i work really hard to throw my husband a surprise 40th and it goes off great without a hitch. He is totally surprised and everyone has a great time. The next day he breaks his leg. Really? He has been skating since he was like four years old and has never gotten hurt. Snow globe shaken syndrome. Then we lost his grandfather at the beginning of the year. An amazing man who fought in world war 2 and was a Lynn cop. He had some amazing stories to tell that I could just sit and listen to for hours. The rain hasn't stopped for what seems like a month.

and yesterday more bad news that I am not ready to talk about yet. I am just so sick of people tipping over my snow globe and to them I say cut the shit I have had enough.....a little bit of good news would be greatly appreciated....

Life is like the jogger who has been jogging for miles only to find out that he hasn't gotten anywhere...he's on a treadmill when all along he thought that he was making huge progress in getting to his destination....do they really even ever have a destination or do they just run and run for the only reason of staying fit which to me seems like a stupid reason to run...which I guess is why I will never be skinny....and I will never figure out my destination....I don't want anymore bad new, I just want to figure out what I am supposed to do so that nothing else goes wrong....when you figure it out let me know.....

peace out.....

Really more rain???

So it is just so depressing to wake up to rain yet again this morning. Places are still drying out from the last flood, I think that I am ready to build an ark. I mean seriously we are getting all of this rain right now, but come July when I have my sprinklers on people are going to be bitching because we will be in the middle of a drought. HOw is that possible?? You just can't win I guess.

I am anxiously awaiting the hazy hot days of summer. I look at my pool and seeing that big black cover on it is actually starting to make physically ill. I think that when you get older the winter(which I hate anyway) becomes longer and more annoying. I mean why the hell do I even live in New England when there are a million places on Earth that never get snow. O wait I know because people like my husband love the winter. And other friends that have moved South, tell me o you would miss winter if you moved away from it. My ass I would, if I never saw snow again it would be just fine with me. I hate being cold and having to go outside and shovel. Which is very fortunate for me that my husband has a snowblower otherwise I would probably just barrel ass my big ole truck right threw the snow banks and call it a day.

My kids are going stir crazy...my son finds it absolutely necessary to run circles around my house literally. He has so much pent up energy that he needs to expel. He really needs to be outside playing. And how many times can you take your kids to those germ invested indoor playgrounds and just hope and pray that they don't catch the swine flu while you are there. So you bring them there and then you literally pour antibacterial shit all over them, burn their clothes when they get home, and shower them immediately. Yet they still wake up the next day with giant green boogers hanging out their noses....it's a no win situation!!!

and so I saw to weathermen everywhere...people will like you a lot more if you stop reporting all of this depressing shit weather and for the love of god and the health of children everywhere....BRING ON THE SUMMER!!!

catch you on the flip side dudes.....CHOW!!!

Saturdays UGH!!

So my daughter's talent show went great. They did awesome!!

Ok so I got up this morning and went to a softball clinic to learn how to coach little girls to play softball. Only to find out that everything that I ever learned to how to do regarding softball was totally wrong. I was always a great hitter, but come to find out it was because I was not standing properly and I was casting. Casting is when you swing to early and connect with the ball too late. So the clinic director put me in the right stance and now according to him I am a power hitter. LMAO!!! I am grateful that I am only an assistant coach because if I had to do this by myself I would fail miserably. As it goes I am pretty sure that I am in way over my head...

I am trying to figure out why my children do not have the ability to sit and entertain themselves with the thousands of dollars of toys that they own. Instead they continue to annoy each other and get into trouble. My son wants to do everything that his sister is doing. And she for the most part does not want to play with him because 4 years in between them is a giant difference. It aggravates me to no avail. I can't stand telling them to be nice to each other. I can't stand listening to them argue. So what do you do?

I remember when I was little, I was sent outside with my cousins and told don't come in until the street lights come on. We always had fun playing stupid things. We didn't need toys, we used our imaginations. What happened to the days of kids just going outside and digging a hole with a stick. or swinging on a swing until you reached the sky. or playing hide n seek. If I told my mom that I was bored, she would just laugh at me and tell me to find something to do...I think that there are too many things that are used to entertain kids today. They need to used their imaginations more and stop driving me NUTSO!!!

sideshow freak...

ok so about every two week I take timeout for my self and I go and get my nails done. I started to go to a new place about six months ago. It is very pleasant, very clean, and basically I like it. Anyone who has gone to have a manicure or a pedicure knows we don't want conversation we just want to relax and enjoy the experience. For me lately I have it a chore to go and get my nails done.

So today I go and the little asian woman looks at my nails, she proceeds to tell me that she doesn't want to put nails on two of my fingers. So I am immediately pissed off and I ask her why? She says well your fingers no good!!! My fingers no good??? Well gee that explains everything, I am thinking to myself I need a god damn interpreter to figure out why they are no good. So after she proceeds to make a friggin sideshow out of my nails by inviting every friggin manicurist in the god damn place to come over and look at my nails they have all dertermined they samething....YOUR FINGERS NO GOOD....so I say what do I have a fungus under my nails? and they say no....

So apparently I have dry cutiles and dry nail beds....really you think?? Just shut up and put the god damn nails on and this is relaxing??? I think I have had enough of the nail salon for awhile...i need to find something that is relaxing for me to do...once every two weeks, but I love my nails too....I wish that I could just blink and they would be done....

So my daughter has her talent show tonight at school. She is dancing to Miley Cyrus...Party in the USA... The dance is great, she is so talented. Everything that she does she excels in. I am proud of her everyday. One of the acts in teh talent show is to have the whole school lip sync We Are The World....really have you ever tried to teach a bunch of elementary school children what lip syncing is?? LOL they just don't get it...some sing out loud and some whisper and some just stand there not sure what to do...it's pretty hysterical...

anyway I will let youknow how it goes.....so you put your hands up...there playing your song..and the butterflies fly away....yeah yeah yeah it's a party in the usa...

a whole new world...

Did you ever think that you were just one scratch ticket away from changing your life. Sometimes I get so excited when I buy a scratch ticket or a powerball ticket and I think about all of the things that I could do with a million dollars. I remember one day having a conversation with a friend who couldn't even comprehend the amount of money that you could win. He kept saying I would pay off my house and buy a new car. I kept telling him to think bigger, but he couldn't understand what I meant.

I guess some people are just happy with the simple things and only wish to be happy. I want those things to, but I could imagine traveling all over the world, seeing the wonders of the world and how they could change my views. It would be nice to never have to worry about paying bills again or writing a budget.

But I guess that's why they call them scratch tickets because every time you buy one, the dreams that just coming rushing into your head give you a sense of what could be.....but then again would it be better or worse...Hopefully I will get the chance to let you know someday...lol

Peace out cub scouts....

ahhhhh the dreaded wing nite....

ok so you know that I am a bartender and that I work at a Sports bar......but what you don't know is the insanity that is wing nite. Every Tuesday night, we have 35 cent wings. We are known for our wings. IT IS COMPLETE INSANITY....35 cent wings and 2.00 moosehead drafts. We are right down the street from Salem State so we are a college bar. The kids that come in are for the most part great and they tip really well, but alas I can not stand wing nite.

They can order wings in any way that they choose. We have about nine different flavors and they can mix and match. Some people will be normal and order like 10 wings and get some of them teriyaki and some of them honey bbq. Then there are the jackasses who order one teriyaki, one bbq, one thai, and o can I have a side of blue cheese and side of ranch and o yeah can I get two napkins and a wet nap and one ice cube in my drink. so three wings and a drink with one ice cube...AHHH my life as a bartender...

I had this chick last night order a drink and get carded. She did not have proper id so she was denied her drink. Her friend comes to the bar and orders a drink which conviently was the same drink that her friend just ordered. So I carded this girl who had the right id, gave her the drink and then became a detective. I watched the second girl take the drink back to the table and put it down in between them. The first girl then picks up the drink and takes a sip. I go over to the table and take the drink away and say hey did I just not ten seconds ago tell you that you couldn't get a drink. And she says o I thought that meant that I couldn't drink at the bar....HAHAHAHA really are you not even kidding me? So I took great pleasure in throwing both of them out the door!!!!

Then I get this dude come in and he hands me an id, the id scans he orders a moosehead, I give it to him. He says hey what's your name? I said Michelle he goes (LOL) my name is Kyle.... I said really cause your id saus that your name is Ryan...He goes o Kyle is my middle name...so I start laughing and I say give me your id. He hands me his id I say what's your address? He goes it's 7 whatever Street....and I say WRONG IT'S 15 WHATEVER STREET NOW GET THE HELL OUT YOU IDIOT....all he had to do was shut his mouth he already passed with the fake id I didn't catch him and he messed up what a jackass!!!

ahhhh wing night.....if you have ever worked a bar in your life you can relate....if you have ever drank at a bar you can relate....I hate stupid people, but for the sake of argument they certainly give everyone something to laugh about.....

PEACE, LOVE AND BLACK LIGHTS....

really?

So yesterday I went to the United Nations aka Market Basket. I find that there are so many things that annoy me about this store, yet I keep going back. I bring my own bags due to my daughter, who insists on making me green...So I ask the bagger whom I help to bag my things, to please put everything in bags. She says ok no problem, and then not ten seconds later she says do you want this is a bag? No really I want everything in a bag except that....please don't bag that one thing...which by the way was a btl of soda. It really annoys me...but I will be back next week..

Also I my car battery died yesterday when my husband was picking up my son at preschool. So I took his truck to go to jump my truck, but hey guess what the latch that opens his hood....BROKEN So no jumping my truck, we called triple A as I was rushing in truck with my son to pick up my daughter who had talent show practice directly after school. Only to find that his truck also had a leak in the windshield that has been there for awhile, dripping onto his dashboard. Why didn't he just get it fixed? O IDK? that would be normal...

So then I rush to work after talent show practice only to find that the computers are not working, my boss is unreachable and I have no idea how to fix them...so I make a few calls and needless to say I have to meet a guy at work today at 10:30 am with my 5 year old son, so that he can fix the computers. Mind you I am just the bar manager and I do not get profit sharing....

let's just say if I didn't have a great sense of humor yesterday would've totally sucked, but alas I have lived to tell the tale. If you haven't guessed by now I tend to be a little bit sarcastic and I don't take myself to seriously. So when you read my blogs please use them for entertainment purposes only....LAUGH OUT LOUD!!!

have a great day people!!!

Well this is the first blog that I am posting. I feel kinda weird writing my thoughts down for people to read. But here goes. I am bartender and I have a unique job in that I get to meet people that in the real world I probably wouldn't had the opportunity to know. Some of them are truly great people and some of them are just plain crazy. Sometimes the crazy ones are way more fun though...ha ha ha

I went to the bruins game today with my husband. It was a great game lots of fights and some great hockey playing. O and they won let's not forget the most important part. Anyway as we were driving in to the Garden...BTW it's not the old garden it's great to watch a game but it doesn't yet have the history or the character of the old Garden...anyway we drove past this man who was waving people into a parking area. He was waving the flag and talking to people walking by. He was clearly not a rich man and my husband asked me how much do you think he gets paid to do that job...I said probably about 5o bucks a game. He said and he's loving life right now...and I thought you know what he probably is...

when we entered the parking garage, I saw an attendant standing there doing the same job that the not so rich man was doing, except the difference was that he looked clearly annoyed. I thought to myself how can he not appreciate having a job right now.....Strange how people are different....