Katie unedited and Pittsburgh Baby

So who takes a 12 hour car ride to Pittsburgh and actually enjoys the peace and quiet of the trip.....I did that last weekend with two great road trip buddies...we traveled to Pitt to surprise one of my very best friends ever....She had no idea that we were coming and her husband was in on the surprise....only he is terrible at keeping secrets so i was very nervous that he would spill the beans... which he may just have i don't yet...

So the trip down there was fun minus the two hours of traffic that we had to sit on 95 to get to the Mass Pike...one of the worst traffic merges that I have ever seen in my life where 93 merges with 95...I mean who's friggin idea was that? and you would think with all of the road work that we pay for they could fix it so that it's not car ass to car ass of traffic... Another thing that I noticed is that the curiosity factor that we hear about so much on the radio traffic reports is actually true...there is a fender bender on the other side of the highway, you know two cars barely touch each other and it backs up traffic for miles on the other side of the highway because people are so friggin nosey that they want to see what's going on...o wait here's a thought turn your flipping head pay attention to what is going on in front of you and drive your car....do you really want to see if someone is dead on the other side of the highway that bad to slow down to a turtle's pace to check it out?

Anyway when we finally got to PIttsburgh I was so excited to see Katie and Brian....Katie walked into the bar where we met them and pretty much had a look of confusion on her face at first and proceeded to say that she knew I was there....which is why I think that Brian may have spilled it...but seriously we just drove 12 hours shut the fuck up and pretend you are surprised before I kill you....we proceeded to drink our faces off that night....last call in Pittsburgh is 2 am great just what we need an extra our of drinking...but I think that I did a little happy dance when I found out....so I decided that at about 1 am it was time to do some shots...brilliant move on my part back to back to back shots of jager...at which point Katie's elbows were now attached to the side of her body and she was a T-rex...now mind you she was sitting on a bar stool and she tried to reach for her shot with her elbow stuck to herself and when she did she fell off the bar stool spilled the shot on herself and Jess and then fell to the floor...the bar stool went about 4 stools down and i couldn't stop to help her up because I was laughing so hard that I just may have peed my pants....when she got up finally...her first words were "how the fuck does one fall from a sitting position"...clearly an unanswerable question....

One may have thought that they night should have ended there...for normal people it probably would have but not us...anyway when we finally got back to the hotel everybody was so tired, but I was pretty wired from drinking about 27 vodka red bulls...what the hell do they put in that stuff anyway....Everyone finally passed out at about 3:30 am....well that was until...
All of a sudden I hear this hysterical laugh coming from the direction of Katie and Brian...followed by fucking bitch fucking bitch and more laughter...I see Katie get up and fall on top of my other friend who was asleep and woken up with a jolt...she proceeds to start to bear crawl across the bed mumbling about peeing and still laughing...mind you she was sound asleep!! Her husband gets up takes her into the bathroom and I can hear her still laughing....they come out of the bathroom and Brian has his arm around Katie who proceeds to crumble to the floor and Brian doesn't notice because he continues to walk back to bed with his arm out like he is still holding Katie up...Katie is now laying on the floor laughing and still asleep....I go to help her up with my arms under her arm pits I drag her to bed with her legs traveling behind her...where she collaspes...you would think the night ended there right....well um not so much after about ten minutes this ungodly snore escapes from her that should never come from such a little girl...it was the snore of a 700 pound man...but here it was coming from my tiny little friend...and I started to laugh because what could i do....I shook her, slapped her, pinched her nose and tried to roll her over...nothing worked...and when she finally woke up in the morning....she woke with a bright eyed Hey how did you guys sleep? and I just sat and laughed, she didn't remember anything and that my friends is one of the many reasons...why I LOVE KATIE SO MUCH....

The trip after that first night just got better....we went to a cowboy bar where my friend who doesn't drink mind you had at one point 6 or 7 happy hour vodka tonics in front of him....needless to say his late night didn't turn out so well....I on the other hand felt his pain for puking up all of that cheap vodka but I also found myself sitting in the tub holding his hair back while he puked with a slight grin on my face...NOt to say that I was happy that he got sick, but that I was finally sure that he was officially drunk...

Let me tell you about this place called Primanti Brothers...why anybody in their right mind would eat here boggles the mind...but it is a Pittsburgh staple, if you go to Pitt then you eat at Primanti's....so here's how it goes, you pick your meat of choice...which I will tell you the grossest thing that could be picked was picked by my friend...two runny fried eggs...so they put this on bread and then add coleslaw to that proceeded by the greasiest french fries that I have seen in my life on the sandwich...all of that in between two pieces of bread o yummy....I almost threw up watching him eat it...but he and everyone else ate their sandwiches with gusto...but later in the evening it didn't look to tasty coming back up...LOL

So at this cowboy bar they had a mechanical bull....totally wanted to ride it but like all females that have some self respect I didn't want to embarass myself...as I watched these chicks get up there one after one I remember thinking I could do that...UNTIL this chick got on the bull with a jean mini skirt on and she proceeds to dry hump the bull to the point that her mini skirt was up around her boobs and her ass cheeks had completely eaten her thong....so now this chick is riding this bull bare ass.... a normal person would let go and just fall off...not this chick she was proud as a peacock with her lilly white ass hanging out all over the bar....imagine the next person who rode that bull with all of her fluids staining the seat....

So I could go on and on about how much fun that I had in Pitt...but it time for dinner so i gotta go....I did get to see Amish people which was awesome and I got some new ink...WHOOP!!! WHOOP!!!

PEACE, LOVE AND PITTSBURGH BABY!!!